Couples Counseling

My approach to couples counseling designates emotional safety as the cornerstone of the relationship.

People hold so many hopes and expectations for their romantic relationships — and because of that, romantic relationships often carry the most wounds. Over time, if not addressed, those wounds fester.

It’s become popular for couples to talk about attachment styles — but the bottom line of attachment is this: our nervous systems tell us whether we are safe or unsafe in a relationship. If we feel unsafe, we deploy survival responses. The fighting, running away, avoiding conflict, tuning the other person out — it all comes back to a sense of feeling unsafe in the relationship.

With me, you and your partner will learn to identify your patterns, your survival responses, and the “festering wounds” — the wounds that have gotten deeper and deeper as time has gone on. Together, we will design tools to help you regulate your nervous systems both together and separately, communication strategies to create changes, and eventually, be able to have corrective experiences with each other so your nervous systems can finally settle into the safety they crave.

Here are some dynamics I especially love to work with:

• Neurodiverse Couples (one or both is neurodivergent)

• One/both partners possesses extreme trauma

• Infidelity/Betrayal Trauma